A Disclaimer

This blog will hopefully be an interesting and relatively witty account of my time in Korea. If this turns out to be false, please don't read it, and accept my apologies.



Also, I have lived here for 8 months, so I don't have all the amazing 'I've-just-got-here-wow-look-at- that' stories. But I saw a woman walking down a street with a dog on her head. Stood up. On her head. These kind of stories I will share.

Wednesday, July 7, 2010

England you are a complete disappointment. Cheers!


'England fans! Don't be disappointed about all those unused St George flags, simply paint the red cross white and sell it to the French to use.'
Ah, how jokes get old fast.
One thing I will say is that the World Cup has reminded me of how overwhelmingly dull our national anthem is. No wonder Gary Neville never sung it.......




Ours is about 300 years old, sounds like a nursery rhyme, and reminds everyone how we should pray to God to save the Queen. It's 2010. Two people I feel I couldn't have less in common with. Neither, it seems, does Scotland. Not a God or a Queen to be heard in theirs. Although plenty of anti-English rhetoric. Around 1996 they decided to use the Flower of Scotland as their unofficial anthem. (yes, as bizarre as it seems, god save the queen is shared by everyone.) Well, not everyone, anymore......On that note, a big happy independence day to all you Americans out there.....Your welcome!

A simple idea to help make the World Cup more enjoyable for English people.
Decrease the quality of refereeing.
It's simple, and, as Capellos bulging package (wage package, you dirty buggars) will attest, much cheaper. All you need to do is reduce the amount of referee training; in 5 years you would be able to save money AND see a noticeable drop in footballing standards. This would also be a great time to begin and reduce referees pay. Then we will have a level of refereeing similar to that in South American countries. Unfair? How very dare you!
Take this example; the (Brazilian) referee for the England v USA game was suspended in the Brazilian league for, as Flemengo eloquently argued; an 'unambiguously inconsistent, unfair and inequitable technical performance.'

Not to be outdone, the Palmerias chairman piped up, calling him a
'a crook, a scoundrel and a shameless bastard.'

And he was the referee that Brazils FA picked to officiate at the World Cup. He was their NUMBER 1 man! If England are going to be outplayed in tournaments for the foreseeable future, the least we can do is make it a bit more exciting by sending an incompetent, possibly corrupt, refereeing team. This would mean we could cheer on 'the boys' well into the semis, and possibly even the final.

Man it's been a funny one at work. Had the students making World Cup Posters;
So, what's your team name?
'Blackmans'.
'Excuse me?'
'Blackmans.'
Erm, you can't have that.'
'But I like them.'
'I'm glad you do, but you have to change it.'
'Oh, Ok.'
They had to write English on the poster. Heres what we got.....
Height: 189cm
Age :29
Position: Defender
'He played Bridge wife very bad boy.'

And Joseph Yobo?


We got this.
Is that racist? I recall Sarah Palin refering to the country of Africa. Is that racist? Or just naive and innocent? Thing is, Palin wasn't, and to my knowledge, still isn't, a Korean high school boy.

I think I might have to do a lesson on the different races and countries in the world. Could be fun, will definitely be an eye opener! Sarah, your invited to my School in South Korea (Asia).
In other amazing news, I got Air Conditioning! Unannounced, obviously. My mentor teacher, who is a HERO, took a phone call, turned to me and said, 'You will get air con today. Lets go to your apartment now.' He was slightly concerned about the state of my apartment, too many water bottles being his chief concern. However, despite all the bottles, it was successfully installed, and I am now enjoying sleep at a reasonable temperature.



I bought a new camera, so I will really try and get some new snaps up soon. As soon as I see anything that interests me. We'll get the ball rolling with this sticker on the back of a car. Can't work out what it means really.



It says



'At the celestial body is personified god, at dawn he rises up across the sky from the Eastern Ocean, the Oceanus to the Western. In the night he sinks under the Western, crosses the ocean by golden boat, and turns back flow of the ocean to the East. He goes around the sky, and is known to the witness of pledge and oath as being able to observe everything of the world.'

For those Marvel fans with a keen eye, yes, the sign below is indeed the top of the Spiderman logo. Is the text describing Spiderman, or is it some religious thing? I genuinely have no idea. It could be a Korean Christian thing........Arrrggghh!!!! (PLENTY more on them next time)

Catch you crazy kids next week!
x

2 comments:

  1. KenschweinsteigerJuly 8, 2010 at 6:51 PM

    can i assist you in your 'the world and its racist faces' classes? :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Well Mr KenSchweinsteiger, I would appreciate your help. I want my kids to learn from the best, and I hear that you are the best at what you do. Come to Iksan, South Korea and you can do a lesson. We can all learn about the 'sneaky' Indians or the 'greedy' Japanese;)

    ReplyDelete